[What good was a practice without direction? Rin's doing him a favour. Even if Ai's intention had only been to focus on his acceleration because he knows he's good at it, and then focus on mechanics - but Rin's pushing him, so Ai obliges.
By the end of it, he's wiped. But appreciative nonetheless, only contributing more to his suddenly amenable attitude.
Ai swims to the ladder to crawl out like a normal human being, shaking his head at Rin's question and approaching the bench to pick up his towel,] This much is fine... Anything more and I'd get more out of the water if it was in a bath tub. [Implying his exhaustion.
He comes up to Rin, pauses. Seems to mull something over in his head, and then suddenly is speaking with a resolute if forlorn tone, towel draped on his shoulders.]
Rin-senpai. [He shakes his head, and then suddenly bows deeply, spelling his sincerity.] I'm sorry for earlier. It doesn't matter whether or not my intention was understood... I said something hurtful. [And how unlike him was that? It's unusual for Ai to apologize for an outright transgression.]
You could never be petty nonsense to me. So please don't believe such a thing.
[he's expecting... something. even if he isn't sure what, after ai towels off and rin awkwardly looks around like he's deciding between going to the locker room or drowning himself in the pool.
the apology isn't exactly what he was thinking of. especially not ai taking responsibility for their earlier transgressions. rin just stares at him like he's sprouted a second head somehow, and bites his lip. instead he just takes a step back, gaze shifting towards the floor]
...c'mon man, you don't need to do that here.
[he appreciates the apology. but it's not like rin's hands are clean in all of this. in fact he's pretty sure he's the one that started all of it to begin with. even if he was just trying to fall into old habits of how he talked to ai back when he coached him. much like this. rin's fingers wrap around his wrist, digging into it a little bit]
I started it, so it's fine. Sorta deserved it.
[rin feels awkward standing there, and so starts making his way towards the locker room, jerking his head for ai to follow with a huff]
It's fine. We're good. Don't worry about it so much. We both need a clear head after all this shit, right? Stupid to waste time dwelling on stuff like that.
[It wouldn't have been like Rin not to take the apology, but... All, the same, the speed with which Rin tries to move past it almost makes Ai regret opening his mouth. Almost. Except Ai has always been about being the bigger person, and being stalwart in a maelstrom of uncertainty, and there was no doing any of that without taking accountability.
So rather than shrink, he huffs! Rising to full height again and carrying right on the back of Rin's heel toward the locker room. In a way, it was a somewhat nostalgic scene.]
I was thinking about it the whole time I was in the water! It really bothered me, you know? It just didn't feel right. I don't like feeling as if I've made something worse.
[Prattle, prattle... His tone is almost indignant, but not in a very serious way; it could be more described as if he's huffing. Pouting, even. Guess that makes two of them now, for once for the right reasons.
In the locker room Ai quickly diverts to the showers, peeling off his jammers and doing a very hasty rinse down. Again pauses to look at those bruises, fresh on his hips... He turns his back to Rin over in the heart of the locker room just a little more.]
I wonder if they'll still make me work my morning shift, [he says absently. As if truly trying to usher them away from their whole ordeal.]
[rin grits his teeth, not knowing why ai is still talking about this. he feels like the matter is done and over with, door closed. but he's still... right, probably just filling the silence. something rin has been known to do more than once. sometimes with his words, other times with his fucking mouth. all he says before he gets into a shower stall far away from ai is simple]
I said it's fine. You didn't make anything worse.
[so why does nothing feel fine? ugh. rin washes off just as quickly, devoid of any of his own bruising for once. lucky him, he thinks with a small grimace. but he's determined to not ignore ai, apologies still fresh on his lips or not. thankfully, ai seems to have shifted topics and rin can fluff the water off of his hair in a more peaceful manner]
You gonna go in and just quit on the spot? Or offer to work your whole shift since you're ditching them for the world stage?
[he smirks lightly, digging around in his bag for the clean pair of clothes he shoved in there. he doesn't mean anything by it, there's no weight. even if he's still stepping on eggshells for the forseeable future]
[There is still just-- this hiss in Rin's tone. It unsettles Ai, who is trying so hard to make things right, and though Rin gives him platitudes, he cannot help but feel as if Rin's just saying it to get it over with. Should he have waited to open his mouth until they were back at the apartment? Should he not have apologized at all?
But that's not right, he thinks, stilling under the water flow, because when you hurt someone, it's only natural to want to make things right.
...
Chasing the rabbit down its hole on that one might give Ai a second mental breakdown, so instead he quickly shuts off the water and heads for his locker to begin pulling out clean clothes. He decides he's finished trying to gauge Rin's mentality for the night, finding it increasingly difficult to pinpoint. If he steps on a landmine, so be it.
Rin's more lighthearted question has Ai simpering, not that Rin can see it as he pulls a shirt on,] Of course I intend to work. But something tells me they'll send me home early.
[A world stage... It was impossible for Rin to feel bitter about that, right? Fuly clothed, Ai closes his locker, ruffles a bit more water out of his hair, and hoists his bag over his shoulder.]
Nothing's set in stone until they announce the final roster, but... It's hard not to be a little excited. [He smiles, just a little, eyeing Rin from the corner of his purview.] You could stop by for one last coffee, if you want.
[spare yourself the breakdowns ai, they're not worth it.
he pulls his own tank top on and a pair of shorts, fumbling for his jacket to toss over him as well. still keeping his gaze fixated elsewhere. whether he's sparing himself or ai though? that's a totally different matter entirely]
Ah, yeah makes sense. Sure, I'll grab one last cup from you guys though.
[it's funny how the course of one day can shift things so much. rin makes a point to bother mikhail tomorrow about training camp scheduling. and hopefully not dip their toes back into whatever this whole tabloid reporter whatever mess is (it's not a tabloid, that's the worst part of this!!). rin finally tugs his jacket down over his head, gathering everything in his bag before slinging it over his shoulder in turn]
Yeah, yeah. We're making it just fine. You'll see.
[or so he hopes that some stupid whatever won't tarnish his reputation to the point team japan decides to wash their hands clean of him--nope. not thinking that, not even going there. he grabs his phone out of the side pocket on his bag, shoving it into his pocket]
[Rin can grant himself a measure of reassurance that if nothing else, he has a personal coach vouching for him, and if shit hits the fan, it's more likely Ai will take the hit. If the team and their PR manager needed an out, Ai was ultimately less of an asset; it'd be the logical choice.
This of course is only vaguely in the back of his mind, Ai again instead focusing on that which is already determined. He qualified; he has to quit his job; his phone hasn't exploded, indicating no new developments.]
Ready.
[Threadbare doesn't cut it; Ai is exhausted, his body finally matching where his mind has been for hours. Somewhere between the faint spell earlier and a good workout, Ai is certain he'll sleep well tonight. Still has his reservations about where Rin's head is at, but Ai's been worked into a corner he isn't familiar with and is unsure how to navigate out of: asking Rin and injecting himself seems akin to heresy. Ai might go as far as to assume he's well and truly made himself a tumour. And maybe this, too, can be healed with time, but as it stands, Ai can't think of anything actionable to try and get back in his good graces, his trust, and if the exhaustion doesn't claim him tonight, running his head in circles will.
The walk back is much calmer and more normal than the walk to had been; mostly quiet, though Ai occasionally chimes in with attempts at conversation. Not for idle talk, but because he enjoys when Rin volleys, the times he does.]
[some time trickles on, and things remain questionably tight between the two of them once more.
rin seems shunted in his missteps throughout the last several weeks. so he pours what he can into training, keeping ai's house clean again, minimizing his footprint in the apartment and looking towards the future--and what exactly that looks like. he's awkward reached out to kisumi once or twice, asking to get in touch with his uncle. but chickens out and mourns whatever the hell this is last minute and says 'nvm' (kisumi didn't even know rin moved back, thinking he was just here for qualifiers. he really needs to get his ass back out there, ugh).
eerily, there have been no further anythings from the press. a few missed calls from numbers he blocks so fast once he weeds out sponsors. rin hates it. almost wonders why they're sitting on something like that. are they waiting for the other shoe to drop? mikhail shrugs it off per usual, telling rin to focus on other things instead.
and so he does.
like swimming almost every night until he drops.
he hasn't seen much of haru or sousuke much. or rather outside of the pool. they all run into each other during practices, and azuma and mikhail definitely capitalize on the way rin and haru push each other more simply being in opposite lanes. but their focuses are all elsewhere. even if rin's is on... whatever the hell the future looks like.
he tries to remain chivalrous with ai, even if the comments from that night still stuck. but he also knows he has no room to complain, going off the nasty shit he's said to ai equally. and so he just lets it fester, hoping it rots away into nothing.
it's just ai and rin at their local gym tonight. getting in a few things. rin is hauling himself out of the pool with a heaving gasp, slumping belly first on the concrete and fumbling for his phone in his jacket pocket. he blinks at the new text from mikhail and squints down at the screen. ai swimming or hauling himself out of the pool or whatever and rin grins and chucks his goggles at him making an excited noise]
Training dates are in. Next week you'll be a certified international traveler.
[it's the first time he's looked so excited and pumped up in a while]
[As with most things, time was a salve. And the deeper he and Rin fell into routine, the easier it was to push things away. To forget how readily and willingly Rin had been to misinterpret him; how readily Ai walked back on promises. It wouldn't be unusual to say that in the weeks since the day after All Japan Ai's been a bit distant; he had wounds to let heal, and training to focus on. Cages to keep closed.
Things are pleasant, if a bit-- just always a little off. Not entirely unlike their first year together, though Ai has to say Rin's had significantly less meltdowns since. He has wondered once or twice if that was Ryuji and his protege's influence, and Ai is ashamed to admit the green eyes it's given him. All kept well to his chest, of course; little was going to break his focus this time around.
He'd been finishing the last 50m of a 400m stint when Rin hauled himself out, and was only half-way down the lane when Rin's goggles nearly pelt him as soon as he surfaced for a breath. Ai reaches into the water to grab them before they're able to sink and then comes to the pool's edge, face beaming.]
So it's settled! Are our itineraries the same, senpai? [Leaving and arriving the same days, flying on the same flights, sharing the same rooms - these had all been on Ai's mind, too. Pressed more than once by both Mikhail and their team manager if he had any preferences and caveated they couldn't promise anything, but Ai remain tightlipped so as not to potentially inconvenience others.
He hauls himself out of the pool, bringing himself up onto his feet much more gracefully than Rin. He's leaning over with his palms on his elbows, though, still pulling air into his lungs, and leans over some as if trying to peek at Rin's phone screen.]
It'd be nice to get the team together for a dinner, I think. [His smile turns gentle.] Or maybe just our friends? I don't know if that'd upset some of the guys, though...
[Subtly, Ai's fingers on his right hand pinch into the skin of his thigh.]
Ahh... It's real...! Paris!! Ah, you shouldn't swim in the Seine, Rin-senpai. There's bodies in there. [completely normal thing to say, Ai.] But there's several beaches nearby that'd be worth checking out off the itinerary.
[rin squints back down over the finer details. he gets so worked up and excited over things, sometimes it's easy to just... miss the basics]
Leaving Monday... direct flight, yeah I think they crammed us all on the same one. Ugh. Never going to escape these fucking fourteen hour flights...
[rin is absolutely moping, will he ever go on a plane for less than a decade? sounds like a personal problem, matsuoka. he tosses his phone back onto his jacket, rolling over to lay flat on the floor and staring up at the ceiling for a moment. before he makes another noise and rubs his palms against his eyes]
Fair warning, I deprive myself of sleep for a good fourty eight hours before that type of thing.
[just as a heads up in case he's...crabbier than usual. since there's been a space of reprieve between them without any of his tantrums. but ai brings up a good point, and oh yeah. getting the team together would be nice. but just their friends? even nicer. rin ruffles up his sopping wet hair, pushing himself back up to a sitting position]
Maybe just our friends? I'm sure the other guys won't mind...
[but. rin can't help but just stare at ai. because??? what the fuck??? he gives him a weirded out look, slack jawed and wide eyed]
What the fuck Ai?!? Bodies? What does that even mean!?
[totally... blitzing over the other part where ai says there's better places to check out. no way he's honed in on that weird little detail his roommate decided to drop]
[His reply to Rin's warning of potential cranky tantrums is immediate and familiar,]
I can handle it.
[-- and maybe just a little tongue-in-cheek, too, given how peaceful yet borderline sterile the atmosphere has been lately. Definitely more on Ai's part than Rin's; making himself scarce, focusing hard on swimming, and keeping his cards impossibly close to his chest have naturally lent to a bit of distance between the two of them. Wounds needed dressing, so he dressed them. Tumours needed pruning-- well. He was working on that.
Still, he can't help but smile and laugh just a little when Rin flops and rolls on the tiled floor, hands politely folded behind his back. Rolls his eyes up in thought when Rin agrees it might not be a bad idea.]
Monday's right around the corner, and we have even less time if you want to show up in proper form. [Those two days of no sleep, he means.] Maybe it's better to do it once we're all in Paris... But a send-off really would be nice....
[Hemming and hawing... Then Rin's guffawing at him, and Ai smiles in that I'm not weird you're weird way of his.]
It means don't swim in the river, senpai! I guess it's allowed, but I don't think it's a very good idea.
[Rin wants to make some retort that yeah he knows ai can handle it. But for some reason that dies on his tongue. Instead he scoffs, and pushes his hand through his hair]
I’m telling you. Starve yourself of sleep and an allergy pill? You’ll have the best flight ever.
[he settles on instead. But ai is right. They’re right on the cusp, and that excitement is looming. Just like before all Japan. Rin stares up at Ai contemplatively before pressing his knuckle to his chin as though in deep thought]
Yeahhhh. Maybe once we’re all there and unjetlagged. Show us some of your weird body rivers. Long as that’s not what we’re eating too!
[he says with a smirk, hauling himself to his feet]
Yeah yeah fine. No swimming in the river. That’s foul, dude. Not even gonna ask how you know that…
[Ai had given solid advice against tourist traps and health hazards. Rin's suggesting post-humous cannibalism was ever on the table?! Ai can't tell if he's pulling his leg, taunting him for saying something weird, or playing it all straight. He feels mildly made fun of, but shrugs it off expertly, nose in the air and fighting down the flush that threatens to overtake his cheeks.]
I feel I did okay on the flight to Budapest, but I got really lucky and didn't have anyone sitting next to me...
[Professional pivot, Aiichirou, good job.] Maybe it's worth being cranky for two nights. Especially if I get sat next to someone I'd rather not... [Or Nanase. Not because of awkwardness, but because Ai knows he'd try to strike up convo to find similarities to get rid of the big bad beast in his head, and he knows Nanase wouldn't reciprocate. Ai isn't about to endure a social pain like that for nearly thirteen hours. The inverse could be true, too; Shiina could talk circles around him, and Ai isn't so sure he can endure that for such a length of time either... Rin's method is appearing more appealing by the second.]
Ah, by the way, I'll skip the shower. I want to run the length home, so I'll take one when we get back.
[but the topic changes direction, and rin simply rolls with it, wishing to keep them from any discomforts he's previously plunged them into. time and time again at that. rin grabs his bag, and begins to head back towards the locker rooms.
seating assignments are literally the last thing on his mind. hopefully too passed out to care if ikuya is annoying him, or natsuya was getting sloshed. haru or ai would be fine, he guesses? sousuke or alone would be most preferable of all though, let's be honest. but alone isn't happening in a millenia, and suddenly rin just hopes he gets stuck with sitting next to a coach or something]
Someone's got a fire lit under him.
[rin comments over his shoulder as he starts pulling his clothes on. he's not one to be one upped thanks!! so guess he'll just run too. it's still awkward back at the apartment. because rin looks places and remembers things and fuck ups and a plethora of other things. but he tries to shove that thought aside as he pulls on a tan top and a running jacket, grimacing as he peels his jammers off.
yes jammers. no legskins anymore in competition. ugh. haru's going to have a fucking field day seeing this pathetic display]
Race you home?
[he offers instead. that seems more tame, right? nothing like a little competitive spirit to get them both mustered up for the following days]
[Ai's flame may not burn as brightly and encompass as many people as Rin's, but he was a competitive swimmer all the same! And certainly hated to underperform. His smile could even be described as a little bit cocky, Rin pointing out the obvious.
All the same he is in the changing room just long enough to peel his swim shorts off and pull his clean clothes on. Hoists his sports bag over his shoulder and, when asked to race the way back, tightens it just a bit across his chest.]
Whoever loses pays for dinner?
[It'd inevitably be Ai; Rin's legs were longer. Ai had the stamina over him in spades, but they were both acclimated to running this length. All the same, what harm was there in some stakes? He could still try.
This much was easy. A common peace; something nostalgic in both its simplicity and how it seems to be doing a dogshit job at plastering over the obvious. But Ai knows those sorts of things only come to be fixed with time; either time to forget, or time for people to come around. He's famously good and even diligent at extending patience, and so doesn't mind.]
Feel like I'm the one who keeps reminding you not to forget.
[rin sticks his tongue out, he doesn't even bother tossing a gaze ai's way like he might have once. nope. he sticks to his own corner, sticks to his own boundaries now. he fumbles around his bag for his pair of running shorts he's stuffed somewhere......aha, there they are, and he begins to pull those up to his hips, near stumbling through the second leg. slick puddle. swim pool locker. you think he would memorize these things, but alas.
this is rin matsuoka we're talking about here]
You're on.
[he'll see that bet, not just because he knows he'll win but because he's fucking exhausted and doesn't feel like cooking anything tonight. hell, he'll eat instant noodles or a bowl of rice at this point. even if the giddy excitement stirring in him over their upcoming travel plans is coursing through him.
he's good at masking. what rin is more surprised about is how good ai is too. he knows there's some shit they've brushed under the rug. a lot of stuff in fact. but pretending like it hasn't existed to begin with? avoiding stepping on one another's toes, and pressing too close.
or maybe rin is just overthinking, and that's truly just him. entirely possible. he sits down to begin shoving his wet clothes in his bag, grabbing his phone and blinking at the screen first, still not giving ai a once over until he's absolutely sure he's done changing]
Not doing udon though, that's my only requirement. Got any requests in case you beat my ass?
[Ai is famously bad at keeping his cards close. Their first year together, he made zero attempts at hiding his borderline undying fealty for Rin, and the only reason he ever slowed his roll is because Rin moved out. By the time Ai developed words for all he'd felt, they'd been so engrained into what it even meant for him to be Rin's friend. Not worth mincing. He never had to hide it, because he lived it daily.
Then he slipped.
Ai is famously bad at keeping his cards close, but famously excellent at learning something from nothing. Zero natural talent for swimming yet competing internationally; zero natural talent for masks, yet in record time he's learned to keep one up for Rin's sake. Or maybe this, too, is all a part of the delinquency Rin had taught him?
Thoughts that only barely flit through his mind; he's making for the locker room exit, pausing with his back against the push-bar as he waits for Rin to get his stuff together.
Rolls his eyes up in mock-thought. He may be self-kept, but he was never not friendly or playful; they were still friends, after all. Rin still his most important person.]
Your eggs are pretty good. If it's your loss, maybe we do Western breakfast for dinner.
[His smile is easy-going, using the small of his back to push the door open, waiting for Rin to exit into the aquatic center, and then to the entryway. If Rin starts, Ai will immediately give chase!]
...well, okay. maybe western breakfast doesn't sound so bad after all. rin opens his mouth, about to say something about ai holding the door open for him. but it falters quickly, and he swallows it down. clicking his tongue, and hiking his bag a little higher up on his shoulder. he begins his stupid jogging backward nonsense, hands stuffed into his pockets and a smirk back on his face, replacing whatever might have just flitted across his features.
always slipping back into that mask]
You're on, shorty. If you win, I'll even throw in those fluffy pancakes you like.
[there is no way in hell ai is going to win this. but rin lags a little in his weird backwards trot, keeping his focus on ai. game on. it's fun to pretend anyways. well, when it's not hurting people in emotionally baring yourself to them at least...
he shoves the thought away, spitting akin to a cat when he nearly beefs it on a small crack in the sidewalk. okay, yeah. he's focusing now!! he turns back around with a scoff, setting a good pace. ai's apartment isn't far. the sights around him achingly familiar now. all of this sucks. he sucks for messing this up in the first place, and possibly considering moving his ass out. but that's not important.
training camp!! that's what's important now! rin calls over his shoulder, all cocky toned and smug because that's just how he is]
Better get ready to call up that place with the gyutan!
[It's for the better Ai doesn't notice he's accidentally drawn a parallel, and doesn't notice the flash of something across Rin's countenance. That memory, despite all, still remained precious to him. Perhaps precious because it was back when everything was so-- easy. And light. And it didn't feel like a sin to wonder for a fleeting moment whether or not he had been flirting, and whether or not Rin had been flirting back.
This time, of course, he's only being friendly and courteous.
He's quick to follow after Rin and laughs a little when he nearly trips; Ai immediately picks up the pace to capitalize on Rin's fumble, going so far as to strongly smack Rin's shoulder with his palm as he begins to jog. At Rin's quip, Ai levels him with an annoyed expression that still manages to be playful,]
You're only eight centimeters taller than I am!!,
[before breaking out into a proper run, one hand steady on the strap of his sports bag to keep it from banging against his back too much. They both knew without a shadow of a doubt Rin would make it home first, but. Ai was still determined to try! His feet pound into the pavement hard enough to reverberate between his ears. Straight here; a turn here. Rin's already pulled ahead, but it only spurs Ai on to run faster, now in a full-on sprint; he's catching up.]
With that thick sliced ham too!, [he shouts, taunting. There's less than a third of the way left now; Ai can see their building in purview. Would that his legs could carry him faster, but for not exactly being an Olympic track and field athlete, his sprint is pretty impressive on its own.]
[it's some small wonder that despite everything, they can still slip into moments like this. where it almost feels that nothing happened at all. sans... the contemplation of whether it was all innocent or whether that little feeling in rin's chest was something else or--]
Still taller!
[rin calls cattily over his shoulder, letting ai close the distance a little bit. it brings a faint stirring to his heart again, the thing he knows isn't just from running. or maybe it's more of a weight in his chest, an agonizing guilt from all the shit he's tarnished in the very place they're sprinting back towards. the place he's thought about ditching time and time again, but can't quite pull the plug on.
but... rin slows a bit purposely this time, though he can pretend to blame it on his leg. it's been fine since that day he embarrassed himself, but sometimes he still favors it. just out of caution. and now is one of those times. ai's speed is impressive, and seeing a stupid spark reignite behind his eyes make's rin...]
Ah, fuck!
[he hisses. it's a complete fake out, but he pretends to hop on one leg a bit from a "cramp" and slacks in his movements, giving ai that last bit of distance he needs to sprint up the stiars towards his victory. whether ai decides to take it or not, rin has his hands pressed against his knees, bent over and sucking in a few breaths. that sprint on top of the way they beat their bodies ragged in the pool today is enough to make anyone winded]
[Ai blows past Rin on the stairwell, and in similar fashion falls with his hands on his knees in a desperate attempt to pull air into his lungs, head hung low as he does. Once upon a time, his respiratory could have been described as weak; building up his stamina and swimming have certainly helped in this regard, but land training - running included - can sometimes pose a small problem.
Once he's pulled enough air down to breathe steadily, he looks to Rin with a pulled brow and a pout to match! Ai slides a hand back through his hair, inadvertently ruffling it up as he pushes it away from his sweaty forehead.]
Senpai, it's no good if you just throw like that!
[Ai can smell from a mile away when you're being soft on him, Rin. Ai knows Rin would never ever second-guess Ai's athletic prowess, so the reasons for why Rin would force the loss in their friendly bet is lost on Ai. Maybe he just really wanted eggs and Canadian-styled ham, too? Ai stands to full height, still catching his breath, hand reaching into his zipped coat pocket for his house keys. As he tries to fish them out he mutters,]
You owe me a rematch,
[Before finally getting his keys, fishing them out, and unlocking the door. He's about to push it open, but hesitates, looking down at Rin just beside him. Through his put-on and playful ire, there's a sudden spark of sincerity... Just in case.]
You didn't really cramp, did you? Are you alright?
[rin huffs, pulling himself up and pressing his hands against the small of his back. he scowls and gives ai a dirty look, watching him muss up his hair for a moment. before he rolls his eyes]
Fine. Whatever. Ham and eggs just sounded good, sue me.
[he huffs in response, trying to pop something knotted up in the small of his back while he waits for ai to open the door. but they falter in the doorway momentarily, and ai is just looking at him. before dipping into more worrying territory, and rin just snorts]
I'm fine. Also, you didn't hear this from me, but. [he pulls his bag a bit lower on his shoulder, leaning in like it's some deep, dark, horrible secret he's about to share] Literally everyone on the swim team used to wish you'd mess your hair up more like that. Looks waaaay better.
[and he fucking loses it, and a laugh barks out of him, before he pulls back, hands back in his pockets and waits for ai inevitably throwing something at him, or slamming the door in his face. both would be well deserved but]
[Rin borderline looms over him, and Ai subconsciously presses his back further against the door. A feeling that had grown somewhat unfamiliar rears itself in his gut and his chest, half-way split between a warmth Ai would have once said paired with it like the sun paired with the sky, and a dank cold that sends a chill down his spine at memories he's tried very hard to keep buried deep. Deep.
He knows Rin wouldn't try again - trusts he wouldn't. But. A proximity like that, and a nature and longing Ai just can't shake no matter how hard he tries, it's hard not to start doomsday prepping.
For all his fretting, Rin's just teasing him, and sure as sunshine gets a monster-sized pout out of Ai, who isn't sure whether he should feel flattered or insulted. His face is heated to the colour of Rin's hair, less so at the insinuation their old team apparently found him attractive and moreso at the insinuation that Rin did, after all. Under some circumstances. Now was really not the time to try and contend with any of this, and in a flustered hurry, Ai is petting his hair back down to lay neat and flat on his head again.]
Is that a normal thing to think about someone...?! What do you mean the whole team!!
[I'm doomed until the day I die, Ai reckons, staring at Rin with a deadpan he so badly wishes would offset the latent flush to his cheeks. Ai neither throws something nor slams the door; Ai instead takes Rin by the backs of his shoulders and all but shoves him inside.]
[rin spits as ai shoves him past the door but not after undoing the mussed up appearance he was just saving himself with. whatever don't take his fashion advice!! rin kicks his shoes off indignantly, bristling as he looks over his shoulder]
And yes the whole team thought that, damn!!
[rin distinctly remembers momo telling him ai was cute once when his hair was all puffed up and hot and-- he shoves that thought aside. nope. nope. not right now. next time he'll keep his fashion, hair style, whatever advice to himself and be done with it. rin groans, but decides okay. being a shit is fine if ai is going to be this offended and he sags against ai's hands digging into his shoulders, leaning back into them with all his weight while supporting himself on his heels]
Think I remember you saying something about... me throwing the match? Does that mean I still have to cook? I dunno.....
[yes he's absolutely being a monumental shit right now since ai called him out and ignored him. it's the first time things have felt normal in weeks, months in fact. rin knows he has to do laundry and pack and get shit ready. but slipping back into something for just a brief millisecond is stupid. but he's selfish and never claimed to be smart]
[Not because Ai's self-esteem was low - not anymore, anyway - but the idea of Rin, specifically, confiding in or gathering this intel from their old team is laughable in how foreign it is. Or maybe Ai was projecting, his attempts at putting space between them obfuscating things he might've taken for granted in the past. For example, Ai thought of Rin often, so it stood to reason Rin maybe thought of Ai often... Especially in the context of swimming. But now, Ai operates under the exclusive purview of if I don't hear it or see it, it didn't happen. As far as Ai's concerned, if he isn't under Rin's nose, he's an afterthought now.
And Ai never heard wind of this in high school, so!!!
Rin quite literally digs in his heels, and Ai does a few mental calculations to make sure Rin wouldn't break his neck before... Oops, yeah, just as Rin leans back against him Ai is letting go and stepping aside and see you next fall, Rin.
You can make fun of his hair and talk behind his back. You can throw a friendly competition. But reneging on dinner plans? That's three strikes, Matsuoka, and Ai isn't impressed! He toes off his shoes and marches into their apartment.]
I'm going to shower! Cook or don't! But next time you flake, I'm not forgiving you so easily!!
[Is he pouting? Maybe. Truthfully... That spark of something old, and familiar, makes it truly difficult to be annoyed at Rin. Ai just wishes it didn't come at the expense of essentially cutting himself in half. Ai spares a moment to drop his sports bag near his bed and gather clean clothes before entering the bathroom... And...
Okay. He stares in the mirror. Ruffles up his hair. And stares longer. I don't get it...?]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2025-09-23 11:05 pm (UTC)By the end of it, he's wiped. But appreciative nonetheless, only contributing more to his suddenly amenable attitude.
Ai swims to the ladder to crawl out like a normal human being, shaking his head at Rin's question and approaching the bench to pick up his towel,] This much is fine... Anything more and I'd get more out of the water if it was in a bath tub. [Implying his exhaustion.
He comes up to Rin, pauses. Seems to mull something over in his head, and then suddenly is speaking with a resolute if forlorn tone, towel draped on his shoulders.]
Rin-senpai. [He shakes his head, and then suddenly bows deeply, spelling his sincerity.] I'm sorry for earlier. It doesn't matter whether or not my intention was understood... I said something hurtful. [And how unlike him was that? It's unusual for Ai to apologize for an outright transgression.]
You could never be petty nonsense to me. So please don't believe such a thing.
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Date: 2025-09-24 03:34 am (UTC)the apology isn't exactly what he was thinking of. especially not ai taking responsibility for their earlier transgressions. rin just stares at him like he's sprouted a second head somehow, and bites his lip. instead he just takes a step back, gaze shifting towards the floor]
...c'mon man, you don't need to do that here.
[he appreciates the apology. but it's not like rin's hands are clean in all of this. in fact he's pretty sure he's the one that started all of it to begin with. even if he was just trying to fall into old habits of how he talked to ai back when he coached him. much like this. rin's fingers wrap around his wrist, digging into it a little bit]
I started it, so it's fine. Sorta deserved it.
[rin feels awkward standing there, and so starts making his way towards the locker room, jerking his head for ai to follow with a huff]
It's fine. We're good. Don't worry about it so much. We both need a clear head after all this shit, right? Stupid to waste time dwelling on stuff like that.
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Date: 2025-09-24 03:43 am (UTC)So rather than shrink, he huffs! Rising to full height again and carrying right on the back of Rin's heel toward the locker room. In a way, it was a somewhat nostalgic scene.]
I was thinking about it the whole time I was in the water! It really bothered me, you know? It just didn't feel right. I don't like feeling as if I've made something worse.
[Prattle, prattle... His tone is almost indignant, but not in a very serious way; it could be more described as if he's huffing. Pouting, even. Guess that makes two of them now, for once for the right reasons.
In the locker room Ai quickly diverts to the showers, peeling off his jammers and doing a very hasty rinse down. Again pauses to look at those bruises, fresh on his hips... He turns his back to Rin over in the heart of the locker room just a little more.]
I wonder if they'll still make me work my morning shift, [he says absently. As if truly trying to usher them away from their whole ordeal.]
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Date: 2025-09-24 04:00 am (UTC)I said it's fine. You didn't make anything worse.
[so why does nothing feel fine? ugh. rin washes off just as quickly, devoid of any of his own bruising for once. lucky him, he thinks with a small grimace. but he's determined to not ignore ai, apologies still fresh on his lips or not. thankfully, ai seems to have shifted topics and rin can fluff the water off of his hair in a more peaceful manner]
You gonna go in and just quit on the spot? Or offer to work your whole shift since you're ditching them for the world stage?
[he smirks lightly, digging around in his bag for the clean pair of clothes he shoved in there. he doesn't mean anything by it, there's no weight. even if he's still stepping on eggshells for the forseeable future]
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Date: 2025-09-24 04:11 am (UTC)But that's not right, he thinks, stilling under the water flow, because when you hurt someone, it's only natural to want to make things right.
...
Chasing the rabbit down its hole on that one might give Ai a second mental breakdown, so instead he quickly shuts off the water and heads for his locker to begin pulling out clean clothes. He decides he's finished trying to gauge Rin's mentality for the night, finding it increasingly difficult to pinpoint. If he steps on a landmine, so be it.
Rin's more lighthearted question has Ai simpering, not that Rin can see it as he pulls a shirt on,] Of course I intend to work. But something tells me they'll send me home early.
[A world stage... It was impossible for Rin to feel bitter about that, right? Fuly clothed, Ai closes his locker, ruffles a bit more water out of his hair, and hoists his bag over his shoulder.]
Nothing's set in stone until they announce the final roster, but... It's hard not to be a little excited. [He smiles, just a little, eyeing Rin from the corner of his purview.] You could stop by for one last coffee, if you want.
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Date: 2025-09-25 03:33 am (UTC)he pulls his own tank top on and a pair of shorts, fumbling for his jacket to toss over him as well. still keeping his gaze fixated elsewhere. whether he's sparing himself or ai though? that's a totally different matter entirely]
Ah, yeah makes sense. Sure, I'll grab one last cup from you guys though.
[it's funny how the course of one day can shift things so much. rin makes a point to bother mikhail tomorrow about training camp scheduling. and hopefully not dip their toes back into whatever this whole tabloid reporter whatever mess is (it's not a tabloid, that's the worst part of this!!). rin finally tugs his jacket down over his head, gathering everything in his bag before slinging it over his shoulder in turn]
Yeah, yeah. We're making it just fine. You'll see.
[or so he hopes that some stupid whatever won't tarnish his reputation to the point team japan decides to wash their hands clean of him--nope. not thinking that, not even going there. he grabs his phone out of the side pocket on his bag, shoving it into his pocket]
Ready?
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Date: 2025-09-25 03:41 am (UTC)This of course is only vaguely in the back of his mind, Ai again instead focusing on that which is already determined. He qualified; he has to quit his job; his phone hasn't exploded, indicating no new developments.]
Ready.
[Threadbare doesn't cut it; Ai is exhausted, his body finally matching where his mind has been for hours. Somewhere between the faint spell earlier and a good workout, Ai is certain he'll sleep well tonight. Still has his reservations about where Rin's head is at, but Ai's been worked into a corner he isn't familiar with and is unsure how to navigate out of: asking Rin and injecting himself seems akin to heresy. Ai might go as far as to assume he's well and truly made himself a tumour. And maybe this, too, can be healed with time, but as it stands, Ai can't think of anything actionable to try and get back in his good graces, his trust, and if the exhaustion doesn't claim him tonight, running his head in circles will.
The walk back is much calmer and more normal than the walk to had been; mostly quiet, though Ai occasionally chimes in with attempts at conversation. Not for idle talk, but because he enjoys when Rin volleys, the times he does.]
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Date: 2025-09-26 02:17 am (UTC)rin seems shunted in his missteps throughout the last several weeks. so he pours what he can into training, keeping ai's house clean again, minimizing his footprint in the apartment and looking towards the future--and what exactly that looks like. he's awkward reached out to kisumi once or twice, asking to get in touch with his uncle. but chickens out and mourns whatever the hell this is last minute and says 'nvm' (kisumi didn't even know rin moved back, thinking he was just here for qualifiers. he really needs to get his ass back out there, ugh).
eerily, there have been no further anythings from the press. a few missed calls from numbers he blocks so fast once he weeds out sponsors. rin hates it. almost wonders why they're sitting on something like that. are they waiting for the other shoe to drop? mikhail shrugs it off per usual, telling rin to focus on other things instead.
and so he does.
like swimming almost every night until he drops.
he hasn't seen much of haru or sousuke much. or rather outside of the pool. they all run into each other during practices, and azuma and mikhail definitely capitalize on the way rin and haru push each other more simply being in opposite lanes. but their focuses are all elsewhere. even if rin's is on... whatever the hell the future looks like.
he tries to remain chivalrous with ai, even if the comments from that night still stuck. but he also knows he has no room to complain, going off the nasty shit he's said to ai equally. and so he just lets it fester, hoping it rots away into nothing.
it's just ai and rin at their local gym tonight. getting in a few things. rin is hauling himself out of the pool with a heaving gasp, slumping belly first on the concrete and fumbling for his phone in his jacket pocket. he blinks at the new text from mikhail and squints down at the screen. ai swimming or hauling himself out of the pool or whatever and rin grins and chucks his goggles at him making an excited noise]
Training dates are in. Next week you'll be a certified international traveler.
[it's the first time he's looked so excited and pumped up in a while]
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Date: 2025-09-26 02:38 am (UTC)Things are pleasant, if a bit-- just always a little off. Not entirely unlike their first year together, though Ai has to say Rin's had significantly less meltdowns since. He has wondered once or twice if that was Ryuji and his protege's influence, and Ai is ashamed to admit the green eyes it's given him. All kept well to his chest, of course; little was going to break his focus this time around.
He'd been finishing the last 50m of a 400m stint when Rin hauled himself out, and was only half-way down the lane when Rin's goggles nearly pelt him as soon as he surfaced for a breath. Ai reaches into the water to grab them before they're able to sink and then comes to the pool's edge, face beaming.]
So it's settled! Are our itineraries the same, senpai? [Leaving and arriving the same days, flying on the same flights, sharing the same rooms - these had all been on Ai's mind, too. Pressed more than once by both Mikhail and their team manager if he had any preferences and caveated they couldn't promise anything, but Ai remain tightlipped so as not to potentially inconvenience others.
He hauls himself out of the pool, bringing himself up onto his feet much more gracefully than Rin. He's leaning over with his palms on his elbows, though, still pulling air into his lungs, and leans over some as if trying to peek at Rin's phone screen.]
It'd be nice to get the team together for a dinner, I think. [His smile turns gentle.] Or maybe just our friends? I don't know if that'd upset some of the guys, though...
[Subtly, Ai's fingers on his right hand pinch into the skin of his thigh.]
Ahh... It's real...! Paris!! Ah, you shouldn't swim in the Seine, Rin-senpai. There's bodies in there. [completely normal thing to say, Ai.] But there's several beaches nearby that'd be worth checking out off the itinerary.
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Date: 2025-09-28 03:19 am (UTC)Leaving Monday... direct flight, yeah I think they crammed us all on the same one. Ugh. Never going to escape these fucking fourteen hour flights...
[rin is absolutely moping, will he ever go on a plane for less than a decade? sounds like a personal problem, matsuoka. he tosses his phone back onto his jacket, rolling over to lay flat on the floor and staring up at the ceiling for a moment. before he makes another noise and rubs his palms against his eyes]
Fair warning, I deprive myself of sleep for a good fourty eight hours before that type of thing.
[just as a heads up in case he's...crabbier than usual. since there's been a space of reprieve between them without any of his tantrums. but ai brings up a good point, and oh yeah. getting the team together would be nice. but just their friends? even nicer. rin ruffles up his sopping wet hair, pushing himself back up to a sitting position]
Maybe just our friends? I'm sure the other guys won't mind...
[but. rin can't help but just stare at ai. because??? what the fuck??? he gives him a weirded out look, slack jawed and wide eyed]
What the fuck Ai?!? Bodies? What does that even mean!?
[totally... blitzing over the other part where ai says there's better places to check out. no way he's honed in on that weird little detail his roommate decided to drop]
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Date: 2025-09-28 03:32 am (UTC)I can handle it.
[-- and maybe just a little tongue-in-cheek, too, given how peaceful yet borderline sterile the atmosphere has been lately. Definitely more on Ai's part than Rin's; making himself scarce, focusing hard on swimming, and keeping his cards impossibly close to his chest have naturally lent to a bit of distance between the two of them. Wounds needed dressing, so he dressed them. Tumours needed pruning-- well. He was working on that.
Still, he can't help but smile and laugh just a little when Rin flops and rolls on the tiled floor, hands politely folded behind his back. Rolls his eyes up in thought when Rin agrees it might not be a bad idea.]
Monday's right around the corner, and we have even less time if you want to show up in proper form. [Those two days of no sleep, he means.] Maybe it's better to do it once we're all in Paris... But a send-off really would be nice....
[Hemming and hawing... Then Rin's guffawing at him, and Ai smiles in that I'm not weird you're weird way of his.]
It means don't swim in the river, senpai! I guess it's allowed, but I don't think it's a very good idea.
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Date: 2025-09-29 12:45 am (UTC)I’m telling you. Starve yourself of sleep and an allergy pill? You’ll have the best flight ever.
[he settles on instead. But ai is right. They’re right on the cusp, and that excitement is looming. Just like before all Japan. Rin stares up at Ai contemplatively before pressing his knuckle to his chin as though in deep thought]
Yeahhhh. Maybe once we’re all there and unjetlagged. Show us some of your weird body rivers. Long as that’s not what we’re eating too!
[he says with a smirk, hauling himself to his feet]
Yeah yeah fine. No swimming in the river. That’s foul, dude. Not even gonna ask how you know that…
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Date: 2025-09-29 01:03 am (UTC)[Ai had given solid advice against tourist traps and health hazards. Rin's suggesting post-humous cannibalism was ever on the table?! Ai can't tell if he's pulling his leg, taunting him for saying something weird, or playing it all straight. He feels mildly made fun of, but shrugs it off expertly, nose in the air and fighting down the flush that threatens to overtake his cheeks.]
I feel I did okay on the flight to Budapest, but I got really lucky and didn't have anyone sitting next to me...
[Professional pivot, Aiichirou, good job.] Maybe it's worth being cranky for two nights. Especially if I get sat next to someone I'd rather not... [Or Nanase. Not because of awkwardness, but because Ai knows he'd try to strike up convo to find similarities to get rid of the big bad beast in his head, and he knows Nanase wouldn't reciprocate. Ai isn't about to endure a social pain like that for nearly thirteen hours. The inverse could be true, too; Shiina could talk circles around him, and Ai isn't so sure he can endure that for such a length of time either... Rin's method is appearing more appealing by the second.]
Ah, by the way, I'll skip the shower. I want to run the length home, so I'll take one when we get back.
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Date: 2025-09-29 11:23 pm (UTC)[but the topic changes direction, and rin simply rolls with it, wishing to keep them from any discomforts he's previously plunged them into. time and time again at that. rin grabs his bag, and begins to head back towards the locker rooms.
seating assignments are literally the last thing on his mind. hopefully too passed out to care if ikuya is annoying him, or natsuya was getting sloshed. haru or ai would be fine, he guesses? sousuke or alone would be most preferable of all though, let's be honest. but alone isn't happening in a millenia, and suddenly rin just hopes he gets stuck with sitting next to a coach or something]
Someone's got a fire lit under him.
[rin comments over his shoulder as he starts pulling his clothes on. he's not one to be one upped thanks!! so guess he'll just run too. it's still awkward back at the apartment. because rin looks places and remembers things and fuck ups and a plethora of other things. but he tries to shove that thought aside as he pulls on a tan top and a running jacket, grimacing as he peels his jammers off.
yes jammers. no legskins anymore in competition. ugh. haru's going to have a fucking field day seeing this pathetic display]
Race you home?
[he offers instead. that seems more tame, right? nothing like a little competitive spirit to get them both mustered up for the following days]
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Date: 2025-09-29 11:44 pm (UTC)[Ai's flame may not burn as brightly and encompass as many people as Rin's, but he was a competitive swimmer all the same! And certainly hated to underperform. His smile could even be described as a little bit cocky, Rin pointing out the obvious.
All the same he is in the changing room just long enough to peel his swim shorts off and pull his clean clothes on. Hoists his sports bag over his shoulder and, when asked to race the way back, tightens it just a bit across his chest.]
Whoever loses pays for dinner?
[It'd inevitably be Ai; Rin's legs were longer. Ai had the stamina over him in spades, but they were both acclimated to running this length. All the same, what harm was there in some stakes? He could still try.
This much was easy. A common peace; something nostalgic in both its simplicity and how it seems to be doing a dogshit job at plastering over the obvious. But Ai knows those sorts of things only come to be fixed with time; either time to forget, or time for people to come around. He's famously good and even diligent at extending patience, and so doesn't mind.]
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Date: 2025-10-01 03:47 am (UTC)[rin sticks his tongue out, he doesn't even bother tossing a gaze ai's way like he might have once. nope. he sticks to his own corner, sticks to his own boundaries now. he fumbles around his bag for his pair of running shorts he's stuffed somewhere......aha, there they are, and he begins to pull those up to his hips, near stumbling through the second leg. slick puddle. swim pool locker. you think he would memorize these things, but alas.
this is rin matsuoka we're talking about here]
You're on.
[he'll see that bet, not just because he knows he'll win but because he's fucking exhausted and doesn't feel like cooking anything tonight. hell, he'll eat instant noodles or a bowl of rice at this point. even if the giddy excitement stirring in him over their upcoming travel plans is coursing through him.
he's good at masking. what rin is more surprised about is how good ai is too. he knows there's some shit they've brushed under the rug. a lot of stuff in fact. but pretending like it hasn't existed to begin with? avoiding stepping on one another's toes, and pressing too close.
or maybe rin is just overthinking, and that's truly just him. entirely possible. he sits down to begin shoving his wet clothes in his bag, grabbing his phone and blinking at the screen first, still not giving ai a once over until he's absolutely sure he's done changing]
Not doing udon though, that's my only requirement. Got any requests in case you beat my ass?
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Date: 2025-10-01 03:56 am (UTC)Then he slipped.
Ai is famously bad at keeping his cards close, but famously excellent at learning something from nothing. Zero natural talent for swimming yet competing internationally; zero natural talent for masks, yet in record time he's learned to keep one up for Rin's sake. Or maybe this, too, is all a part of the delinquency Rin had taught him?
Thoughts that only barely flit through his mind; he's making for the locker room exit, pausing with his back against the push-bar as he waits for Rin to get his stuff together.
Rolls his eyes up in mock-thought. He may be self-kept, but he was never not friendly or playful; they were still friends, after all. Rin still his most important person.]
Your eggs are pretty good. If it's your loss, maybe we do Western breakfast for dinner.
[His smile is easy-going, using the small of his back to push the door open, waiting for Rin to exit into the aquatic center, and then to the entryway. If Rin starts, Ai will immediately give chase!]
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Date: 2025-10-04 01:25 am (UTC)...well, okay. maybe western breakfast doesn't sound so bad after all. rin opens his mouth, about to say something about ai holding the door open for him. but it falters quickly, and he swallows it down. clicking his tongue, and hiking his bag a little higher up on his shoulder. he begins his stupid jogging backward nonsense, hands stuffed into his pockets and a smirk back on his face, replacing whatever might have just flitted across his features.
always slipping back into that mask]
You're on, shorty. If you win, I'll even throw in those fluffy pancakes you like.
[there is no way in hell ai is going to win this. but rin lags a little in his weird backwards trot, keeping his focus on ai. game on. it's fun to pretend anyways. well, when it's not hurting people in emotionally baring yourself to them at least...
he shoves the thought away, spitting akin to a cat when he nearly beefs it on a small crack in the sidewalk. okay, yeah. he's focusing now!! he turns back around with a scoff, setting a good pace. ai's apartment isn't far. the sights around him achingly familiar now. all of this sucks. he sucks for messing this up in the first place, and possibly considering moving his ass out. but that's not important.
training camp!! that's what's important now! rin calls over his shoulder, all cocky toned and smug because that's just how he is]
Better get ready to call up that place with the gyutan!
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Date: 2025-10-04 02:51 am (UTC)This time, of course, he's only being friendly and courteous.
He's quick to follow after Rin and laughs a little when he nearly trips; Ai immediately picks up the pace to capitalize on Rin's fumble, going so far as to strongly smack Rin's shoulder with his palm as he begins to jog. At Rin's quip, Ai levels him with an annoyed expression that still manages to be playful,]
You're only eight centimeters taller than I am!!,
[before breaking out into a proper run, one hand steady on the strap of his sports bag to keep it from banging against his back too much. They both knew without a shadow of a doubt Rin would make it home first, but. Ai was still determined to try! His feet pound into the pavement hard enough to reverberate between his ears. Straight here; a turn here. Rin's already pulled ahead, but it only spurs Ai on to run faster, now in a full-on sprint; he's catching up.]
With that thick sliced ham too!, [he shouts, taunting. There's less than a third of the way left now; Ai can see their building in purview. Would that his legs could carry him faster, but for not exactly being an Olympic track and field athlete, his sprint is pretty impressive on its own.]
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Date: 2025-10-05 02:30 am (UTC)Still taller!
[rin calls cattily over his shoulder, letting ai close the distance a little bit. it brings a faint stirring to his heart again, the thing he knows isn't just from running. or maybe it's more of a weight in his chest, an agonizing guilt from all the shit he's tarnished in the very place they're sprinting back towards. the place he's thought about ditching time and time again, but can't quite pull the plug on.
but... rin slows a bit purposely this time, though he can pretend to blame it on his leg. it's been fine since that day he embarrassed himself, but sometimes he still favors it. just out of caution. and now is one of those times. ai's speed is impressive, and seeing a stupid spark reignite behind his eyes make's rin...]
Ah, fuck!
[he hisses. it's a complete fake out, but he pretends to hop on one leg a bit from a "cramp" and slacks in his movements, giving ai that last bit of distance he needs to sprint up the stiars towards his victory. whether ai decides to take it or not, rin has his hands pressed against his knees, bent over and sucking in a few breaths. that sprint on top of the way they beat their bodies ragged in the pool today is enough to make anyone winded]
Okay, okay. Ham it is, shit.
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Date: 2025-10-05 02:44 am (UTC)Once he's pulled enough air down to breathe steadily, he looks to Rin with a pulled brow and a pout to match! Ai slides a hand back through his hair, inadvertently ruffling it up as he pushes it away from his sweaty forehead.]
Senpai, it's no good if you just throw like that!
[Ai can smell from a mile away when you're being soft on him, Rin. Ai knows Rin would never ever second-guess Ai's athletic prowess, so the reasons for why Rin would force the loss in their friendly bet is lost on Ai. Maybe he just really wanted eggs and Canadian-styled ham, too? Ai stands to full height, still catching his breath, hand reaching into his zipped coat pocket for his house keys. As he tries to fish them out he mutters,]
You owe me a rematch,
[Before finally getting his keys, fishing them out, and unlocking the door. He's about to push it open, but hesitates, looking down at Rin just beside him. Through his put-on and playful ire, there's a sudden spark of sincerity... Just in case.]
You didn't really cramp, did you? Are you alright?
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Date: 2025-10-05 05:40 pm (UTC)[rin huffs, pulling himself up and pressing his hands against the small of his back. he scowls and gives ai a dirty look, watching him muss up his hair for a moment. before he rolls his eyes]
Fine. Whatever. Ham and eggs just sounded good, sue me.
[he huffs in response, trying to pop something knotted up in the small of his back while he waits for ai to open the door. but they falter in the doorway momentarily, and ai is just looking at him. before dipping into more worrying territory, and rin just snorts]
I'm fine. Also, you didn't hear this from me, but. [he pulls his bag a bit lower on his shoulder, leaning in like it's some deep, dark, horrible secret he's about to share] Literally everyone on the swim team used to wish you'd mess your hair up more like that. Looks waaaay better.
[and he fucking loses it, and a laugh barks out of him, before he pulls back, hands back in his pockets and waits for ai inevitably throwing something at him, or slamming the door in his face. both would be well deserved but]
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Date: 2025-10-05 05:54 pm (UTC)He knows Rin wouldn't try again - trusts he wouldn't. But. A proximity like that, and a nature and longing Ai just can't shake no matter how hard he tries, it's hard not to start doomsday prepping.
For all his fretting, Rin's just teasing him, and sure as sunshine gets a monster-sized pout out of Ai, who isn't sure whether he should feel flattered or insulted. His face is heated to the colour of Rin's hair, less so at the insinuation their old team apparently found him attractive and moreso at the insinuation that Rin did, after all. Under some circumstances. Now was really not the time to try and contend with any of this, and in a flustered hurry, Ai is petting his hair back down to lay neat and flat on his head again.]
Is that a normal thing to think about someone...?! What do you mean the whole team!!
[I'm doomed until the day I die, Ai reckons, staring at Rin with a deadpan he so badly wishes would offset the latent flush to his cheeks. Ai neither throws something nor slams the door; Ai instead takes Rin by the backs of his shoulders and all but shoves him inside.]
Stop making fun of me and go cook!
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Date: 2025-10-06 03:18 am (UTC)[rin spits as ai shoves him past the door but not after undoing the mussed up appearance he was just saving himself with. whatever don't take his fashion advice!! rin kicks his shoes off indignantly, bristling as he looks over his shoulder]
And yes the whole team thought that, damn!!
[rin distinctly remembers momo telling him ai was cute once when his hair was all puffed up and hot and-- he shoves that thought aside. nope. nope. not right now. next time he'll keep his fashion, hair style, whatever advice to himself and be done with it. rin groans, but decides okay. being a shit is fine if ai is going to be this offended and he sags against ai's hands digging into his shoulders, leaning back into them with all his weight while supporting himself on his heels]
Think I remember you saying something about... me throwing the match? Does that mean I still have to cook? I dunno.....
[yes he's absolutely being a monumental shit right now since ai called him out and ignored him. it's the first time things have felt normal in weeks, months in fact. rin knows he has to do laundry and pack and get shit ready. but slipping back into something for just a brief millisecond is stupid. but he's selfish and never claimed to be smart]
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Date: 2025-10-06 03:28 am (UTC)[Not because Ai's self-esteem was low - not anymore, anyway - but the idea of Rin, specifically, confiding in or gathering this intel from their old team is laughable in how foreign it is. Or maybe Ai was projecting, his attempts at putting space between them obfuscating things he might've taken for granted in the past. For example, Ai thought of Rin often, so it stood to reason Rin maybe thought of Ai often... Especially in the context of swimming. But now, Ai operates under the exclusive purview of if I don't hear it or see it, it didn't happen. As far as Ai's concerned, if he isn't under Rin's nose, he's an afterthought now.
And Ai never heard wind of this in high school, so!!!
Rin quite literally digs in his heels, and Ai does a few mental calculations to make sure Rin wouldn't break his neck before... Oops, yeah, just as Rin leans back against him Ai is letting go and stepping aside and see you next fall, Rin.
You can make fun of his hair and talk behind his back. You can throw a friendly competition. But reneging on dinner plans? That's three strikes, Matsuoka, and Ai isn't impressed! He toes off his shoes and marches into their apartment.]
I'm going to shower! Cook or don't! But next time you flake, I'm not forgiving you so easily!!
[Is he pouting? Maybe. Truthfully... That spark of something old, and familiar, makes it truly difficult to be annoyed at Rin. Ai just wishes it didn't come at the expense of essentially cutting himself in half. Ai spares a moment to drop his sports bag near his bed and gather clean clothes before entering the bathroom... And...
Okay. He stares in the mirror. Ruffles up his hair. And stares longer. I don't get it...?]
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From:YOU LITERALLY FUCKING STARTED IT THIS IS YOUR FAULT YOU ASSHOLE
From:HAVE SOME FUCKING SELF CONTROL WITH FOOD IN RP BRO blame game isn't cool
From:i wanted to 'yes, and' :'(
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